News Peed

Capital One Employee Unlocks Hidden Boss

RICHMOND, Va. — Excitement struck the West Creek campus of Capital One this morning after a recently hired employee unlocked a previously unknown boss.

Brendan Vaughn, a communications analyst with the Marketing Department, made the discovery after opening a secret portal on the third floor of West Creek 2. According to Vaughn, the discovery was a complete accident.

“Every morning I go through the same routine: I park in the D Lot, walk in through the west entrance, pass the old witch by the elevator, clock in, and then I gather ore through lunch,” commented Vaughn. “Not sure why, but I was running late, so I asked the old witch for the time.” Apparently, Vaughn’s dialogue with the witch opened a dark portal to a hidden necromancer-finance boss known only as Morlanx. “Beginner’s luck I guess.”

Other Capital One employees within the Marketing Department expressed a range of reactions to the news with some celebrating the achievement while others were frustrated they hadn’t discovered the boss themselves. “I’ve been with Capital One for 15 straight years, harvesting mana and meeting deadlines, and I’ve never found Morlanx,” commented Assistant Operations Lead Terry Sanders, “Then this new kid shows up and bam! Morlanx!”

As of press time, Vaughn was seen reviewing his time sheet and powering up his special weapons in the 302-B Conference Room ahead of the match.

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