Advertisements
News Peed

West Avenue Association to Require All Visitors to Take Shoes Off Before Entering

RICHMOND, Va. — West Avenue’s neighborhood association just voted to implement a new policy in which all visitors must remove their shoes before walking through the street.

West Avenue occupants and neighborhood officials told the press that they have been discussing this decree for years and assure Richmond citizens that it will improve the block in many ways. They explained that shoes create a lot of wear and tear on sidewalks, cause unnecessary noise pollution, and bring in an excessive amount of toxic microbes.

“City streets have thousands of people walking on them every day, and shoes pick up 99.5% of public bacteria,” Martha Windsor, president of the West Avenue Neighborhood Association, said. “We work hard to keep our block a pristine oasis, and we just don’t want to bring those outside germs into our street.”

Starting August 1, anyone caught walking through West Avenue without first removing their footwear will either be permanently banned from coming onto the street or forced to provide community service to residents by washing their Lexuses and Yorkshire terriers.

Other policies in the works include a ban on gum chewing, allowing only hypoallergenic dogs, and enforcing a strict “no cell phone” policy.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: