Lori Loughlin Indicted for Bribing Admissions Officials $7 to Enroll Her Daughter at VCU
RICHMOND, Va. — Actress Lori Loughlin has been indicted in federal court for her part in an extensive conspiracy centered on bribing admissions officials to gain entry into elite universities. Recent reports found that VCU was among the colleges embroiled in the scandal, albeit with a much more meager bribe totalling $7.
RELATED (article continued below):
- VCU Brandcenter Offers Newest Track: Insufferability
- VCU Student Quits Drama-Filled Restaurant For Another Drama-Filled Restaurant
- Group of Curious VCU Students Enter One Eyed Jacques, Exit as Newly Formed Dwarf Guild
- VCU Now Requiring Freshman Course “Crossing The Street 101”
According to the complaint, Loughlin coordinated with university officials to facilitate enrolling her youngest daughter at the university after she was denied entry by Radford University and Liberty University. The complaint details that Loughlin used Venmo to transfer $7 to an unnamed VCU admissions official, an action that VCU denies having taken place.
“We are shocked and appalled that Ms. Loughlin would dare to bribe one of our admissions officials with anything less than the price of a movie ticket,” a spokesperson for VCU said in a prepared statement. “We are further shocked and appalled that the bribe in question couldn’t even get you a decent meal at Chipotle. Come on, we’re at least as good as Georgetown, USC, and Yale, right?”
When asked about the $7 bribe, Loughlin released a statement through her attorney: “I vociferously deny these allegations. However, let’s be honest, even a nationwide admissions conspiracy needs a safety school.”
Support our mission to bring you the most (un)ethical journalism possible – visit our online store.
Leave a Reply