Ravens Ominously Gather At Federal Reserve Building

RICHMOND, Va. – According to multiple eyewitnesses, large flocks of ravens have begun gathering in front of the Federal Reserve Bank in Downtown Richmond.

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Colloquially known as “The Fed,” the Federal Reserve Bank of Richmond is one of twelve banks across the United States that acts as a fiscal agents for the U.S. Department of the Treasury. The ominous black birds began gathering around 9 a.m. and, by early afternoon, had completely covered the lawns surrounding the building.

“No one knows where they came from or why they’re here, but it’s really frightening,” commented Federal Security Officer Leroy Williams. Shouting above the deafening “caws” Williams added, “It’s like they know something we don’t.”

Ever since the presidential election in November, Richmond Fed employees have reported sporadic gatherings of birds and rodents around the bank building. However, the number of ravens today are estimated to be significantly larger than any previous murder

Mary Jepson, a branch manager at the nearby BB&T building, is as perplexed as everyone else. She’s been warily watching the growing numbers of the pitch-black birds during her lunch break. “Could be the trees and lawn in Kanawa Plaza across from the Fed attracting all of them. I hope that’s the case. That answer seems a lot more … hopeful. Either way, I’m ready to hear those ravens nevermore.”

At the time of reporting, dark clouds began to form over the area while a low rumble of thunder was heard in the distance.

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