RICHMOND, Va. — Claiming he thought the name of the establishment meant something very different, area fuckboi Dylan Miller was completely disappointed by his first trip to Babe’s of Carytown, sources confirmed Sunday. “God damnit, this is definitely not what I was expecting,” Miller complained frustratedly as he left the venue, discouraged by the lack of straight women available for him to ghost after a month of cheap dates and poor sex.
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“I should’ve known something was up when I was at the bar trying to explain the concepts of modern feminism to the girl next to me and she just wasn’t into it. Why call a place Babe’s if there’s nobody here for me to take advantage of by displaying my wokeness?”
Eyewitness accounts confirmed that after an hour of predatory mingling, Miller left the bar around 1:15 a.m. and sat in his car messaging a dozen past Tinder matches, “hey what r u up to?”
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