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GOP Accuses Danica Roem of Bribing Voters With Earnest, Responsive Constituent Service

WOODBRIDGE, Va. — In a scathing rebuke against “an alarming pattern of corruption and official misconduct,” the Prince William County Republican Committee has accused Del. Danica Roem, D-13th, of attempting to obtain votes “through the provision of earnest, responsive service to her constituency regarding the issues that concern them in a material fashion.”

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“This is typical Democrat chicanery,” PWC Republican Committee Chairman Bill Card said. “For an elected representative to spend hours—whole work days, even—talking to voters, connecting them with state services, requesting information or a status report about specific matters on their behalf, and generally just creating a dialogue between the people and their government so that they’ll vote to keep them in office is, well…it’s wrong.”

“You’d certainly never see any Republican doing that,” Card added.

Roem has claimed she was unaware of Card’s accusations until recently, citing a busy schedule, but insisted she wasn’t ignoring him. “I take Mr. Card’s accusations very seriously,” Roem said while giving free guitar lessons at a local Boys & Girls Club, “and I will respond just as soon as I’ve finished eliminating school lunch debt, reconfiguring the I-66/Route 28 interchange, getting a 5% raise for public school teachers, enacting ‘red flag’ laws to prevent dangerous individuals from acquiring or possessing a firearm if they are deemed a threat to themselves or others, and ratifying the Equal Rights Amendment.”

In response to Roem’s comments, the PWC Republican Committee issued the following statement: “Obviously, Ms. Roem has made up her mind about what kind of representative she wants to be for the people of the 13th District. She’s determined to waste taxpayer dollars on ridiculous, irresponsible pet projects like road maintenance, healthcare, and public education, while altogether ignoring the laments of our burdened wealthy citizens suffering under the yoke of a usury 5.75% income tax rate.”

While a Republican candidate has yet to be nominated to challenge Roem in the upcoming 2019 general election, the Committee has vetted multiple individuals in search of “literally anyone but Corey goddamn Stewart.”

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1 Comment on GOP Accuses Danica Roem of Bribing Voters With Earnest, Responsive Constituent Service

  1. Is this real? Even Republicans have cant be that dumb.


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