CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. — Saying that the milestone called for the grandest of celebrations, UVA bro Chad Donovan hosted a tailgate in the hospital parking lot to celebrate the birth of his son, Chad Jr., sources confirmed Friday.
RELATED (article continued below):
- Study Finds 73 Percent of JMU Students Are Just People Planning to Transfer to UVA
- UVA Suffers Biggest Defeat Since Abolition of Slavery
- Global Sperry Shortage Causes Panic On UVA Campus
The event, which took place in the visitor parking lot at UVA Health System’s University Hospital, began at 9 a.m. and was attended by Donovan, a few of his close friends, a few assorted townies, and Cav Man.
“When we saw that the weather was going to be perfect on the delivery date, we knew that a classic Wahoo tailgate throwdown was the way to go,” Donovan explained. “We didn’t do much for a gender reveal party except destroy a Hokie piñata with orange and blue airplane bottles inside, so we decided to go all out with a classic UVA tailgate for the big day.”
After escorting his girlfriend into the delivery room, Donovan and the group returned to their Ford Escape. They popped open the trunk and set up a table of snacks, a mini-grill, a party tray of chicken wings from Buffalo Wild Wings, and various alcohols, and lounged out in lawn chairs to await the arrival of the newborn son.
“What better way to celebrate the birth of my boy Chad Jr. than with jerk wings from B-dubs and a couple of packs of Miller Lite?”
“This is the happiest day of my life,” Donovan continued, after winning a game of beer pong against Steve Desota, a close friend and godfather-apparent to Chad Jr. “The little guy is due around 1:15 this afternoon, so all of us are doing a shot of Fireball right at that time to welcome baby Chad into the world.”
Due to the fact that Chad Jr.’s tailgate was “totally wicked” by all accounts, the baby has been formally offered a preliminary bid to DKE on the condition that he “doesn’t turn out like a total geed.”
Be sure to swing by our online store before you go back to looking at cat memes or whatever it is you’re doing today