RICHMOND, Va. — Senator Amanda Chase (R-Chesterfield) experienced an unexpected phenomenon during an announcement about her run for governor when thousands of dead birds began falling from the sky onto the grounds of the State Capitol, officials reported Monday.
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“She had just announced her candidacy when out of nowhere a pigeon just fell from the heavens, landing next to the podium,” Carl Semmer, a Chase supporter who was in attendance, commented on the event, adding that he initially thought the dead bird was the victim of one of the many gun-toting patrons also in attendance.
“At first I thought someone just shot it down since everyone here had a gun and was wearing outdoor hunting gear, but before I knew it, hundreds of lifeless birds—warblers, cardinals, and more pigeons—started falling from the sky. It was like someone was bombing us with bird carcasses.”
“The damndest thing was I had just gotten bird shit washed off my car yesterday,” Semmer continued. “Then a rose-breasted grosbeak landed on the windshield, completely smashing it.”
Additional sources confirmed that Chase’s childhood neighborhood of Bon Air also experienced an unusual phenomenon at the time of the announcement, as the Chesterfield locality saw a massive swarm of locusts overwhelm the community.
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