We Tried to Install a Paywall on Our Site but It Got Too Complicated so Just Tell Us Your Favorite Restaurant and Let’s Get It Over With

RICHMOND, Va. — Last Friday we tried to put a paywall on our site in an honest attempt to make some extra cash. Little did we know, the technical aspects behind installing it would be beyond our level of comprehension — but, let’s just forget about that. Instead, just tell us what your favorite restaurant is so we can get this over with.

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Are you a fan of Saison? Have you tried out brunch at BRUNCH yet? Maybe you just really like the Cracker Barrel in Mechanicsville. Regardless of what your favorite restaurant is, just tell us about it so we can all forget about the paywall. It’s bringing us down a bit.

Sure, you might feel a bit betrayed by the fact that you almost had to pay for a localized satirical news site. What can we say? Covering fake news isn’t cheap. And since neither Warren Buffet nor Jeff Bezos have responded to our emails about our investment potential, we figured a paywall would solve all our financial problems. Then, about 12 hours into the installation process, we realized that there is a reason we’re writers and not computer programmers.

We kept trying and figured that if the dolts at the Richmond Times-Dispatch could figure this out, then surely we could too. Alas, we were mistaken, and now we just want to know what the community’s favorite dining establishments are.

Speaking of computers, have you tried the sliders at the Circuit? Or the sliders at Slyderz or Rosie Connolly’s? What did you think of them? Did they distract you from the fact that you almost had to pay to read fake news? If so, those are some good sliders.

So just tell us about the food in our great state so we can all go out, have a nice meal, and forget about this mess.

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