Articles by Jenna Carley

Altria Cigarette Monument Diagnosed With Cancer

RICHMOND, Va. — Altria released a statement today confirming reports that its cigarette monument has been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. “This is sad news for all of us in the Altria corporate family,” the statement read in part. “We [read more ... ]

Following GWARbar Success, O.A.R. Bar Opens in Charlottesville to Much Fanfare, Bro

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. — When GWARbar opened its doors in Richmond’s historic Jackson Ward, the city greeted it with open arms, thrilled to patronize a business celebrating a legendary musical act with local ties. In Charlottesville, a new bar has [read more ... ]

Virginia Universities To Offer Degrees On How To Live With Student Debt

ALEXANDRIA, Va. – Speaking at the annual University Insight Conference held in Alexandria on Wednesday, president of university development Jennifer Burke unveiled plans for state universities to offer degrees and multiple courses on how graduates [read more ... ]

Global Sperry Shortage Causes Panic On UVA Campus

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. – What started out as a normal week at Charlottesville’s prestigious campus quickly spiraled into chaos as a worldwide shortage of Sperry’s brand of shoes struck the area. The shortage is the result of both insufficient [read more ... ]

Arlington Trivia Team Unable to Agree on Snarky Name, Disbands

ARLINGTON, Va. — Unable to handle the pressures of choosing a snarky yet sophisticated name for their group, an Arlington-based trivia team has chosen to disband and dissolve its membership effective immediately. Witnesses to the dispute claim [read more ... ]

Local Man Dead After Being Caught in Stench Nexus of Carytown Vape Cloud

RICHMOND, Va. — Area man David Hodson perished on the 3000 block of West Cary Street yesterday afternoon. Having purchased a birthday card and tastefully whimsical gift for a friend from Mongrel, he was walking up the street to his car when he [read more ... ]

Life-Size Monument of the Richmond Coliseum Proposed on Site of Current Coliseum

RICHMOND, Va. — After constant speculation regarding the future of the Richmond Coliseum, city officials announced Wednesday plans to replace the Coliseum with a life-size monument of the Richmond Coliseum. “Since Richmond is a city filled with [read more ... ]

Richmond City Council Passes Resolution to Argue More Next Week

RICHMOND, Va. — It was announced this morning that the Richmond City Council successfully passed a resolution granting an immediate continuance to argue more in the coming week. The resolution passed with a rare unanimous vote and came just as the [read more ... ]

Ghost of Video Fan Employee Haunts Redbox Patrons

RICHMOND, Va. — Local patrons of the popular video rental service Redbox have complained to company officials about bizarre happenings during their checkout experience at Richmond locations. Reports of a disembodied voice complaining about the [read more ... ]