Articles by The Peedmont Staff

Breweries Adding Etch A Sketches and Hot Wheels to Compete With Barcades

RICHMOND, Va. — In an effort to compete with barcades, several breweries in the Richmond area have added Etch A Sketches, Hot Wheels, and some of the other games you played with when grounded from video games, sources confirmed Wednesday. RELATED [read more ... ]

New Poll Finds 67% Of Richmond Unsure How To Pronounce Burger Bach

RICHMOND, Va. — The results of a recent Gallup poll were announced today, revealing 67% of the Richmond metropolitan population are still not sure how to pronounce the name of local hamburger-based restaurant Burger Bach. RELATED (article [read more ... ]

Henrico Woman Receives 23andMe Results, Horrified to Discover Family Is From Petersburg

GLEN ALLEN, Va. — After participating in the popular ancestry-testing service 23andMe, Henrico woman Priscilla Paterson had an unpleasant surprise when she discovered that she has DNA indicating she is from Petersburg. “It said that I am 95% [read more ... ]

Jefferson Davis Monument 7.5 Percent African American, DNA Test Reveals

RICHMOND, Va. — Popular genealogy testing service 23andme shocked the Richmond community yesterday with its announcement that the city’s famed Jefferson Davis monument is 7.5 percent African American. 23andme initially planned the test as a [read more ... ]

Norfolk to Turn Aging Waterfront Property Into Industrial Wasteland

NORFOLK, Va — In order to preserve the historic character of its downtown, Norfolk City Council officials revealed plans to transform parts of the city’s dilapidated waterfront into an industrial wasteland. Officials call the strategy, developed [read more ... ]

Local Man Suggests Circuit for First, Second, and Third Date

RICHMOND, Va. –– Claiming that they have the best selection of retro gaming machines in Richmond, Fan resident Derrick Walker took Tinder date Ashley Price to local barcade The Circuit for their first three dates, sources confirmed Tuesday. [read more ... ]

Levar Stoney Frantically Searches City Hall Closet for Extension Cord for James Center Grand Illumination

RICHMOND, Va. — Racing against time, Mayor Levar Stoney was seen desperately searching a storage closet in city hall for an extension cord needed for the Grand Illumination, city officials confirmed Friday. “Oh, no. No. No. No,” Stoney told [read more ... ]

Officials Monitoring Migrant Caravan of Tech Bros Moving Across the US in Search of Amazon Jobs

ARLINGTON, Va. — The announcement of Amazon’s HQ2 location in Arlington has sparked a migrant caravan of tech bros moving across the US in search of job opportunities, sources confirmed Tuesday. RELATED (article continued below): The holidays [read more ... ]

Area Millennial Waits Patiently for Satirical News Site to Start Covering the Next Generation

RICHMOND, Va. — Local millennial Walter Harris, who always hopes to read satirical articles mocking Generation Z, was once again reportedly disappointed by his favorite satirical news site. “Every morning I wake up and see a satirical article [read more ... ]