Confederate

VA Flagger Secretly Loves Not Having to Work on MLK Day

RICHMOND, Va. — A member of the Virginia Flaggers organization has reportedly reignited the debate over Martin Luther King Jr. Day, despite secretly enjoying every stinking work-free minute of it. RELATED (article continued below): VMFA Flaggers [read more ... ]

Confederate Flags Ordered to Fly at Half-Staff Following Corey Stewart’s Resignation From State Politics

RICHMOND, Va. — In a poignant display of mourning, Confederate flags across the Commonwealth have been ordered to fly at half-staff following Corey Stewart’s resignation from statewide politics. RELATED (article continued below): We know you [read more ... ]

Jefferson Davis Monument 7.5 Percent African American, DNA Test Reveals

RICHMOND, Va. — Popular genealogy testing service 23andme shocked the Richmond community yesterday with its announcement that the city’s famed Jefferson Davis monument is 7.5 percent African American. 23andme initially planned the test as a [read more ... ]

Corey Stewart Enters Reconstruction Period

DULUTH, Minn. — After being declared the loser in last Tuesday’s election only minutes after the polls closed, U.S. Senate candidate Corey Stewart must once again face a familiar dilemma — figuring out the next thing he can fail spectacularly [read more ... ]

Mayor Levar Stoney Proposes Moving Monument Avenue, Leave Monuments Behind

RICHMOND, Va. — In a bizarre twist on the Monument Avenue controversy, Richmond mayor Levar Stoney recently proposed an option that would leave the statues untouched and instead relocate Monument Avenue. While Monument Avenue has been a symbol of [read more ... ]

Gambling Returns to Virginia: The South Might Finally Win

NEW KENT, Va. — It was recently announced that New Kent County racetrack Colonial Downs would reopen its gates and bring gambling back to the Old Dominion. The announcement and the legislation that facilitated it have been met with incredible [read more ... ]

Virginia Flaggers Erect Over I-64

IN THE MIDDLE OF A GODDAMN FIELD IN LOUISA, Va. — Members of the Virginia Flaggers stood at rigid attention and gave a full salute as a large Confederate flag was raised to flap in the breeze over Interstate 64 in Louisa County. Members of the [read more ... ]

VMFA Flaggers Seen Adding Snow to Cars With Liberal Bumper Stickers

RICHMOND, Va. — Following last night’s snowstorm, Confederate flaggers normally seen outside of the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts were spotted adding snow to cars with liberal bumper stickers. Sources confirmed that the perpetrators were members [read more ... ]

Conservative Wants to Make Left Turn, Decides That’s a Good Enough Reason to Remove Monuments

RICHMOND, Va. — Mechanicsville resident Jimmy Davis recently disclosed that, despite his previous beliefs, he is now open to removing the monuments on Monument Avenue in order to make driving on the road more manageable. Davis, a roofer by trade, [read more ... ]