Craft Beer

Aging Can of Bud Light Tearfully Watches as Local IPA Can Gets Font-of-Shelf Treatment Again

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. — Sadly watching as he plays second fiddle to yet another craft beer, an aged can of Bud Light hopelessly watched as more IPAs took front and center in the beer cooler for the fifth consecutive week, sources confirmed [read more ... ]

Report: Most Disgusting IPA at Brewery Unfortunately Most Potent

AFTON, Va. — According to a new study published by the Commonwealth Committee of Beer Tasting (CCBT), the most disgusting IPA at Ravenous Brewing is also the most potent, officials announced Friday. “After combing through their diverse beer menu [read more ... ]

Netflix Confirms Squid Game Was Inspired by Demand at Hardywood Gingerbread Stout Release Parties

LOS GATOS, Ca. — Noting the common theme of desperation amongst people seeking a grand prize, Netflix executives say that the highly-acclaimed Korean series “Squid Game” was largely influenced by the demand seen at release parties for [read more ... ]

CVS Pharmacist Advises Terry McAuliffe Not To Chase COVID-19 Vaccine With Falcon Smash IPA

RICHMOND, Va. — Stressing the importance of following health guidelines that don’t include downing a hoppy cold one to celebrate, former Gov. Terry McAuliffe was advised not to chase his COVID-19 vaccine with a Falcon Smash IPA, sources [read more ... ]

Report: James River Canal Blocked by Giant Buskey Tart Cherry Cider Can

RELATED: Virginia Department of Health Confirms Craft IPAs Part of 1C Vaccine GroupMan Hospitalized for Sodium Overdose, Doctors Cite Salt LifeJames River Calls in Sick to Work, Actually Heading to the RiverSheetz and The Veil Brewing Team up to [read more ... ]

Virginia Department of Health Confirms Craft IPAs Part of 1C Vaccine Group

RICHMOND, Va. — Stressing the importance of reducing the possible spread of COVID-19 from one bitter IPA to another, the Virginia Department of Health (VDH) has confirmed that craft IPAs are part of the 1C vaccine group, sources confirmed Sunday. [read more ... ]

Brewery Patron Too Shy to Order Something Else After Sampling Disgusting Pilsner

RICHMOND, Va. — Museum District resident Brock Samuels was forced to endure a disgusting pilsner after being overcome with shyness at the prospect of ordering something else once he tasted a free sample of the pilsner, sources confirmed this [read more ... ]

Hardywood Releases 12 Variants of Gingerbread Stout That You’ll Have to Convince Yourself Are Different

RICHMOND, VA. — Citing public demand for one of the most popular seasonal beers, Hardywood Park Craft Brewery revealed plans to release 12 versions of their famous Gingerbread Stout, or GBS, that consumers will have to convince themselves do not [read more ... ]

CDC Warns Public Not to Inject Falcon Smash IPA Into Body to Treat COVID-19

ATLANTA — The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) issued a statement advising against injecting Triple Crossing Beer’s coveted Falcon Smash IPA directly into the human body, officials confirmed Saturday. RELATED (article [read more ... ]