donald trump

Trump Mistakes Buena Vista for Mexican Town, Tries to Impose Sanctions, Sends ICE Agents

BUENA VISTA, Va. — Laboring under the belief that places with Hispanic-sounding names must be full of illegal immigrants, President Donald Trump has imposed economic sanctions against Buena Vista and has sent a team of Immigration and Customs [read more ... ]

Tappahannock Locals Excited To See Native Chris Brown on Virginia’s Presidential Election Ballot

TAPPAHANNOCK, Va. — Expressing excitement about the prospect of their small town finally being put on the map, Tappahannock residents are looking forward to seeing their very own Chris Brown on Virginia’s presidential election ballot, the [read more ... ]

Siegel Center Sues White House Over Name “House of Havoc”

WASHINGTON – Virginia Commonwealth University (VCU) has filed a lawsuit against the Trump administration over use of the branded phrase “House of Havoc” in reference to the White House. VCU created the term “House of Havoc” when Shaka [read more ... ]

Breaking: Politicians Can’t Decide if You’re Better off Dead, or Jobless and Then Dead

RICHMOND, Va. — In an emergency meeting of the General Assembly, politicians from across the commonwealth gathered to settle a pressing question in the midst of the current pandemic: Are you better off dead, or jobless and then dead? [read more ... ]

Virginia to Require ID and Clean Bill of Health to Vote

RICHMOND, Va. — In an effort to get the highest possible voter turnout for Super Tuesday’s Democratic primary, Virginia is now requiring both a valid form of photo identification and a clean bill of health for all voters in order to combat the [read more ... ]

Richmond Restaurant Tax Triples Following Visit From Bernie Sanders

RICHMOND, Va. — Richmond’s local economy has taken a stunning blow since Democratic Presidential Candidate Bernie Sanders arrived in town for his rally at the Arthur Ashe Junior Athletic Center yesterday. Upon stepping foot in the city limits, [read more ... ]

Trump Drafts Chincoteague Ponies to Form First Space Cavalry

ACCOMACK, Va. — Following a surprise statement earlier this week confirming that the United States would soon have a new branch of the military called the “Space Force,” President Donald Trump made headlines once again by revealing that the [read more ... ]

Trump Points to Coal in Stocking as Proof of Virginia Coal Industry Booming

WASHINGTON — Stock prices are expected to soar when trading resumes after President Trump pointed to the vast amounts of coal in his stocking on Christmas morning as definitive proof that Virginia’s coal industry is booming. The President awoke [read more ... ]

People Willing to Share Legal Opinions on Facebook Do Not Know What Impeachment Is

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump has become the third President in American history to be impeached, resulting in many of our readers sharing extensive, complex legal opinions as to the pros and cons inherent in the process. Unfortunately, [read more ... ]