Hiking

Park Rangers Issue Warnings After Hiker Encounters Pack Of Basic Bitches

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. – A local hiker experienced an unnerving encounter yesterday after meeting a wild pack of basic bitches in Shenandoah National Park. Crozet resident, Gary Reinhart, had hiked approximately three miles of the Furnace [read more ... ]

VCU Hipster Determined To Find Hiking Trail You’ve Never Heard Of

RICHMOND, Va. – After a long weekend spent bunkered in the library preparing for upcoming exams, VCU junior Randy Cadinell announced yesterday that he will be heading to Shenandoah National Park next weekend to hike a beautiful trail that no one [read more ... ]

God Postpones Apocalypse After Hiking Through Shenandoah Fall Foliage

HEAVEN — As his majestic voice beckoned throughout the clouds above, God announced yesterday that he has decided to postpone his forthcoming apocalypse until further notice after taking a hike through the autumn-colored wilderness of Shenandoah [read more ... ]

Area Man Gets Lost “Finding Himself” On Appalachian Trail

FRONT ROYAL, Va. – What started out as an adventurous trek through nature for a moment of self-reflection has turned into panic for friends and family of Jonathan Filmore, who has been reported missing after leaving for a hiking excursion on [read more ... ]