Virginia Commonwealth University

William and Mary to Begin Accepting “Arm and Leg” as Tuition Payment

WILLIAMSBURG, Va. – Following a recent increase in tuition cost, the College of William and Mary has announced that they will now accept “an arm and a leg” as means of payment for attending the school. This new form of tuition has been [read more ... ]

VCU Tour Guide Reminds Prospective Students It’s Not Too Late to Start Donating to the Alumni Society

RICHMOND, Va. — Stressing the importance of the society and a lack of funding, VCU tour guide Kelly O’Ryan reminded her prospective students that it wasn’t too late to begin donating to the university’s alumni society, sources revealed [read more ... ]

VCU Assures Public That Whatever Replaces Mojo’s Will Serve the Best $14 Taco You Could Ask For

RICHMOND, Va. — While many Richmonders are still reeling from the announcement that Mojo’s will soon close, VCU has stepped forward to lead the search for an establishment to replace the iconic Cary Street dive, assuring the community that [read more ... ]

Op-Ed: I’m an Incoming VCU Freshman and I’d Love to Tell You Why Jaywalking Is a Human Right

I wasn’t even going to sit down and write this because, let’s be honest, me writing anything is wild. I thought I was going to be done with writing when I graduated high school. Everything I have to say could be accomplished in a couple of snaps [read more ... ]

Inspiring! This Richmonder Trashes Belle Isle With Only Recyclable Material

RICHMOND, Va. — Stephanie Lee, a recent VCU graduate, told reporters that she refuses to trash Belle Isle with anything other than recyclable material. RELATED (article continued below): Ballenger Motorsports has been providing PPE gear (at [read more ... ]

Op-ed: Havoc Doesn’t Live Here, but He Crashes on the Couch Pretty Often

RICHMOND, Va. — I know Havoc. I mean, I guess I know him as well as anyone can really know him. He’s elusive and cagey with the details of his life. I met him eight beers and two Jager shots deep at Delta Chi’s “young tarts and old [read more ... ]

Mechanicsville Man Claims That PC Culture Has Gone too Far by Judging Miss America Pageant Contest Winner on Science Experiment

MECHANICSVILLE, Va. — Claiming that “millennial liberalism is plaguing the world,” Randy Starks of Mechanicsville condemned the Miss America pageant for crowning Camille Schrier, a 24-year-old biochemist student at VCU, as Miss America 2020 [read more ... ]

VCU Bros Wander Aimlessly Through Baja Bean Parking Lot With Tecate Withdrawal

RICHMOND, Va. — Visibly distraught and moderately delirious, members of the Delta Tau Chi fraternity were seen lurking in the parking lot of the recently-closed Baja Bean Co. on Main Street while suffering Tecate withdrawal, sources confirmed [read more ... ]

Sulking Jay Gruden Promised New Job as Head Coach of VCU Football

RICHMOND, Va. — In the wake of Jay Gruden’s firing from the Washington Redskins, VCU announced plans today to extend an offer to the sullen, shell of a man for the head coaching position for their men’s football team. RELATED (article [read more ... ]