williamsburg

W&M Alumni Still Bummed to Encounter Griffin at Home Basketball Game

WILLIAMSBURG, Va. — On a recent trip to a William and Mary men’s home basketball game, Kevin Barnes, ’97, again reacted with a mixture of ambivalence, apathy, and disappointment towards W&M’s mascot the Griffin. “Watching a William [read more ... ]

Norfolk Man Discovers Portsmouth Still Exists

NORFOLK, Va. — Local resident Mark Buckner was stunned this week to learn that Portsmouth, Virginia is still a city. Buckner, 25, reacted to the news of Portsmouth’s continuing existence with genuine astonishment. The Hampton Roads city was [read more ... ]

Norfolk Dad on Family Shopping Trip Upset Only Bench Outside of Victoria’s Secret Already Taken

NORFOLK, Va. — Unwilling to face his daughter’s sexuality, Ghent resident Larry Ramsey was forced to stand awkwardly outside the Victoria’s Secret in MacArthur Center yesterday after discovering the nearby bench was already occupied by another [read more ... ]

Norfolk to Turn Aging Waterfront Property Into Industrial Wasteland

NORFOLK, Va — In order to preserve the historic character of its downtown, Norfolk City Council officials revealed plans to transform parts of the city’s dilapidated waterfront into an industrial wasteland. Officials call the strategy, developed [read more ... ]

Williamsburg Colonist Actor Really Getting on British Patrolman Actor’s Nerves

COLONIAL WILLIAMSBURG, Va. — According to eyewitness accounts on and around Duke of Gloucester Street, Williamsburg colonist reenactor Frederick Blacker has really been getting on the nerves of British patrolman reenactor Roger Smith. Recently [read more ... ]

Norfolk Resident Considering Dealing With HRBT Traffic for a Trip to New Publix

NORFOLK, Va. — Weighing the pros and cons of a trip to Williamsburg for a premier grocery store, Norfolk resident Larry Hughes is considering dealing with the notorious Hampton Roads Bridge-Tunnel traffic for a trip to Publix, sources confirmed [read more ... ]

Virginia Beach Residents Hope That Hurricane Florence Cleans up Boardwalk

VIRGINIA BEACH, Va. — Explaining that the 2018 summer season has been particularly rough in terms of beachgoers’ litter, Virginia Beach residents have their fingers crossed that Hurricane Florence will help clean up the boardwalk, officials [read more ... ]

Virginia Beach Resident Who Regularly Leaves Six-Pack Rings on Beach Upset Turbines Might Kill Birds

VIRGINIA BEACH, Va. — Claiming they will be extraordinarily hazardous to the environment, Virginia Beach resident Shelly Allen, who routinely leaves plastic trash along the beachfront, has launched a protest against the offshore turbines scheduled [read more ... ]

Portsmouth Working to Become “Smart City,” Upgrading From Netscape

PORTSMOUTH, Va. — Stressing the importance of keeping up with technology in a digital age, Portsmouth city officials announced plans to upgrade the citywide internet browser from Netscape to a more modern browser. According to Micah Brookerson, a [read more ... ]