Person Who Won’t Be Governor Says Biden Isn’t Her President

CHESTERFIELD, Va. — Calling President-elect Joe Biden a cheater, a Chesterfield resident, who does not and likely will never hold the title of Virginia governor, refused to acknowledge Biden as her president, officials confirmed Wednesday.

“Not my President and never will be,” this person, who will undoubtedly not be declared the victor in any Virginia gubernatorial races any time soon, said in a statement on her Facebook page, calling for martial law until the 2020 presidential election results were overturned. “Fair elections we can accept but cheating to win—never. It’s not over yet.”

At the time of reporting the citizen, who will certainly not be residing in the Executive Mansion in the immediate future, was working to expose potential fraud throughout the commonwealth, an act that many are calling a “lost cause.”