WAYNESBORO, Va. — Stressing the importance of the Commonwealth’s youth maintaining a healthy and hygienic lifestyle, Gov. Ralph Northam continued his tour of the state today with visits to local elementary schools to personally check all of the students for possible head lice. “The threat of parasites in our children’s heads is a threat that needs to be eradicated with all available resources,” Northam declared, while combing through a first grader’s scalp at Westwood Hills Elementary School for any possible infestation. “Looks clean, Scottie. I brought along some RID kits and small shampoo packets I’ve been stealing from hotels, too, to give out to you little bucks, so take some back home.” Northam went on to mention that, in addition to visiting every elementary school in the state, he was also considering conducting a statewide confiscation of all hair brushes for possible decontamination or destruction.
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